Gordon Biersch Brewery Restaurant

1961 Chain Bridge Rd
Mclean, VA 22102
(703) 388-5454
www.gordonbiersch.com

Visited: January 2010



Everyone says I'm long winded (F U), so I'm gonna keep this review unusually short for blabber mouths like me.

Food is not good, go there only for the draaaaaaaanks (beer).

We had a coupon for a free entree, which was still not worth the money we spent for such bad food. Here's what we ordered:

Teriyaki Chicken & Tempura Shrimp Combo - The chicken of my main entree was burned on one side and just overly sweetened with some bad bad bad Teriyaki sauce. Best part of the dish was the rice...

Cedar Plank Pecan Crusted Salmon - The wife's salmon was dry and flavorless and tasted like it was caught two years ago. Urrrrk!

I'll never go back to eat, but will definitely as Apu says, "Thank you come again" for the tasty beers. With Coastal Flats (CF) directly across the way from Gordon Biersh (GB) and with the entree prices of GB being higher than CF's...why would I ever eat here?!?!

Beers and great "outdoor" tables for fun people watching are the only reasons to come to GB.

Is that short enough ya haters?!?!?

Kohinoor Dhaba

2800 South Eads St
Arlington, VA 22202
(703) 778-5005

Visited: January 10, 2010


Ever since the India Curry House closed down (still bring a tear to my eye and a rumble in my stomach), I've been searching for a place serving some great All You Can Eat Indian food goodness. Well after seeing Donald P's UYE for Kohinoor Dhaba and reading his reviews, my interest was definitely piqued.

Seriously dude, you had me at Tikka...

So here's how the dream visit to Kohinoor Dhaba went down...drop some hints to the wife, tell her how Yelpers have raved about the joint and then once I've got her attention and she looks interested...hit her with the big one:

Chicken Tikka Masala or Butter Chicken

TKO, she's down the count and is seeing curry flavored stars...

Now work the description so much that a Sunday late lunch suggestion in the Crystal City area could easily have her want to hit Kohinoor Dhaba. Oh yes, the plan was in full effect and my advanced degree in Psychology was finally paying off as I had the wife CRAVING the thought of Kohinoor Dhaba as much as I was craving it.

The only solution; to head over to Kohinoor Dhaba and to stuff our faces silly....

The mini van was packed up, the monkeys were strapped in and we headed south down Eads Street with bellies roaring with hunger and churning in anticipation of Indian buffet Nirvana. The sight of the building perfectly matched those images on Yelp and we knew we were just a few second away from satisfying our cravings.

Walking inside, the scent of the food greeted us before the nice lady behind the counter. The nice lady smiled, welcomed us and shared with us the buffet dishes for today:

* Daal - Small lentils
* Saag - Spinach
* Chicken Curry
* Fluffy Basmati Rice
* Amazingly fresh and delicious Naan bread
* Veggies with Potatoes
* Butter Chicken

SIDE NOTE: As my wife just said reliving today's experience, the Butter Chicken was "the bomb". Damn straight ya silly broad, it was indeed the crown jewel of an amazing buffet selection.

Salivating like wild dogs, we took turns filling our plates and made our way upstairs to the seating area. Our monkeys dove into the plates before we did reaching for the fluffy rice and tasty Naan bread. One of the monkeys went so far as to dip his Naan in the butter chicken sauce and smiled happily as he tasted the sauce.

Yes my son, you are correct the Butter Chicken is delish. We all ate our fill cleaning our plates, scraping the bottom of the styro-foam dishes already thinking of our second attack. So here was the breakdown of today's buffet:

- The Daal: delicious
- The Saag: tasty
- The Rice: perfect
- Chicken Curry: awesome
- Butter Chicken: the BEST i've had in months

Yes, everything was amazing and fresh! The bread was a perfect vehicle for stuffing my face with chicken, Daal, Saag and my favorite Butter Chicken goodness. I really can't say enough about this place and really must give Donald P some major props.

I'm definitely coming back here again and again with the wife or with friends. To find an all you can eat place with high quality food at such a great price in this area is truly a find. The monkeys also enjoyed the food as we left Kohinoor Dhaba with two boys with faces and clothes painted in orange butter chicken sauce.

It was a great family experience and despite the stress of the monkeys flinging food all over the place, we had a great time during our maiden trip to Kohinoor Dhaba.

BTW, we're still stuffed and burping up some Kohinoor Dhaba goodness... Ummm...Indian Food...taste it again for a 2nd...3rd...4th time. :-)

Maggiano's Little Italy

2001 International Dr
McLean, VA 22102
(703) 356-5810
http://www.maggianos.com

Visited: January 2, 2010


Let me get this outta the way and do it quickly and up front...

I HATE Maggiano's....I truly do.

But the kicker about Maggiano's is that somehow or other I always end up going there against mine and the wifey's wishes. Even so, you would think that these multiple visits would change our opinion about this mega-corporate food chain? Nope, not one bit.

They consistently let me down time and time again. Last night was our most recent visit which caused me to write up this review to warn anyone that even considers visiting this restaurants (although my experience with all Maggiano's has been exactly the same).

First off, the place on a Saturday is crowded like a mo-fo with people huddles around the bar and waiting areas like eager kids in a roller coaster ride. I have no problem with crowds or lines, provided the food is worth the wait.

Next, the people around the wife and our group of friends were less than civilized. As the wife reached over to greet our friend, her gorgeous hair slightly brushed against another patron waiting for her table which caused a bit of a scene. You would've thought my wife slapped the woman, called her a bitch and spit in her face from this overreaction.

Starting off with 5 possible stars:
-1 star - Lose one star for class-less patrons.

Next, we were seated at a booth in a nice quiet area where our group of 5 could enjoy some great conversation. I liked the location as we were right next to a family celebrating their matron's 60th birthday and I was joking around with one of the small toddlers who was making funny faces and laughing with me.

+1 star - Add one star for great table, intimate environment

The wife and I were S-T-A-R-V-I-N-G but decided to share one Caesar salad and an order or the Lobster fettuccine. In the meantime, the warm bread arrived and our group instantly destroyed it in just a few seconds. The salad was tasty, but had a bit too much dressing for my taste. BTW, the olive oil served with the bread...not too good and you could tell it wasn't of the highest class. But nonetheless add +1 star for warm tasty bread and an "okay" tasty salad.

Our entree arrived and it looked delicious. I was doing my best to give Maggiano's yet another chance and my eyes told me "this stuff looks delicious, aren't you glad we came?" Well, my eyes were fooled but as soon as I tasted the Lobster fettuccine, my mouth yelled, "Your eyes don't know sh*t my friend...this is crap".

The Lobster had an artificial taste and was rubbery, definitely not of the best quality and to make things even worse, was overcooked. I turned with a disappointed look to my wife who leaned towards me and said, "What the hell is wrong with this Lobster?"

After some whispering and quick conferring, we decided to eat around the lobster and finish off the pasta. As we continued eating, I leaned over to my wife and said, "You know, the dish would've been better without the rubbery lobster". Nodding her head she agreed and we slowly finished our pasta.

-3 stars for a very bad entree and for committing 2 of the worst sin of cooking lobster: (1) Using sub-par quality lobster and (2) OVERCOOKING lobster into a rubbery consistency that could bounce off the restaurant's walls!!

As our group finished our food, we continued chatting and the waitress brought over our bill. We paid the bill, but continued to talk. Soon the waitress kept coming over trying to drop hints for us to leave in what seemed like a passive aggressive manner. A few times she would come over, interrupt our conversation and loudly ask, "Can I get anything else for anyone?" After thanking her and telling her didn't need anything else, she'd go off.

A minute later the waitress would return and again in a loud voice to get everyone's attention would announce, "Can I please clear your plates?" and cleared our plates. Two minutes later she'd stop by and would announce, "I need to clear the glasses, can I please get everyone's glasses?" and she'd reach across and pick up all our glasses. Another minute would pass, there were no glasses on the table and she would ask, "Can I get anyone more water?"

Ummm...no, you took our glasses.

-1 star for pushy servers.

Total, 1 star (yet again) for Maggiano's.

After last night's service, I resolve NEVER to visit Maggiano's again. I'd rather spend my money at any of the hundreds of other restaurants where the food, service and environment warrant the money we pay.

I've used this term many times in other reviews...but yes, the "Buyer's Remorse" feeling came out after paying last night's bill. The product was definitely NOT worth the price, and never seems to be for Maggiano's.

Waterman's Beach Lobster Shack

343 Waterman Beach Road
South Thomaston, ME 04858
(207) 596-7819

Visited: July 2009


Rather than go into one of my loooooooooooooooooooooong rants about how good this place is, let me just tell you this:

Back in July 2009 I embarked on my first Lobster Crusade. I drove to Watermans Beach Lobster shack in South Thomaston, ME all the way from the Nation's Capital. That in itself should be an impressive feat, but combine that with a wife and two 15 month old twin boys...a simple foodie trip becomes a bit more of an adventure...a Lobster Crusade!!

On our way to Waterman's beach we passed many signs and restaurants displaying their daily lobster specials at incredible prices. As tempted as we were to stop and abandon our mission, we soldiered on to our original destination. Finally around lunchtime we headed down a dirt road and thankfully were able to see the small sign pointing us in the direction of Waterman's beach. We veered the mighty minivan to the left and saw another sign for Waterman's Beach Lobster shack. We entered the gravel parking lot, unpacked the monkey, a bottle of wine and make our way to the little shack.

Watermans Beach Lobster is a little shack situated on a stone covered beach with one of the most picturesque backdrops you can imagine. The weather was gorgeous and after a loooooong drive from Boston, we were ready for some lobster goodness. We quickly ordered two 2 lb lobsters and 2 lobster rolls. We also ordered some corn-on-the-cob for the two monkeys and planned on giving them some bites of our lobster or lobster rolls.

Fat Daddy Enjoying his Lobsters

Two Fresh 2 lb lobsters cooked to perfection

The food arrived and we were in heaven. I managed to snap up a few pictures of the lobster, my wife and the monkeys before diving into the lobster goodness. A few minutes later the lobster rolls arrived but lobster and butter soaked fingers prevented me from taking any pictures.

Before I forget, a few IMPORTANT tips:
--------------------------------------------------------

1) Cash Only! Bring cash as they do NOT accept credit cards at this fine establishment. When you see the place, I'm amazed they have any modern convinces as it's a cute little shack in the middle of the ME coastline.

2) Bring your vino! You're allowed to bring your own wine or beer provided you transport it unopened in your car. We chilled a bottle of white wine in our cooler to enjoy with our lobster. When you get there, ask for some cups for your wine or whatever poison you bring.

3) Ask ask ask!! If you want a big lobster, don't order off the menu. I made the mistake of thinking (based on the menu) that the largest lobster was 2 lbs, no so. After taking a quick tour of the lobster tanks I was saddened to see 4 to 5 lbs lobster swimming around in the tanks. Had I known, I would've ordered a 5 lb lobster and passed on the lobster roll....naw, I still would've eaten the lobster roll. :-)

You'll also notice as you order you lobster that there is a small award hanging to the side of the order-window. This little lobster shack, hidden away in this beautiful little ME coast has won a James Beard award! Although I was amazed, after woofing down the tasty lobster and lobster rolls I knew why.

The fine folks at Waterman's Beach Lobster shack are doing it right and do it with a smile. The staff are all friendly and loved showing us and the twin monkeys around their little shack. The friendly nature, delicious food and incredible backdrop combine to make this one of the precious treasures for seafoodie lovers everywhere.

I've already told the wife that this summer we'll have to plan a return trip where I'll take on a 4 or 5 lb lobster, and will win. Until then I can only dream of the deliciously fresh lobster and count down the days until we return to that hidden ME beach with the amazing lobster shack.

Ray's Hell Burger

1713 Wilson Blvd
Arlington, VA 22209
(703) 841-0001


Visited: December 27, 2009


A haiku for Ray...whoever and where ever you are:

My buddy Ray Ray
Your steaks and burgers rock mouths.
Butts happily toot "YES!"

After going to see a shitty ice sculpture exhibit and feeling like we threw away our money, we (wife, twin monkeys and my fatter post-holiday self) wanted something to cheer us up. The disappointment from the ice exhibit combined with a hunger only us carnivores could appreciate drove us to visit Ray's Hell Burger. I had wanted to try Ray's for the longest time and was finally able to wrangle the wife and two monkeys to try out the biggest most bountiful burgers in Arlington. Sunday felt like a burger day and what better excuse to fight disappointment (or a self-diagnosed seasonal affective disorder) than to eat something as comforting and tasty as a well cooked burger.

As soon as I parked the minivan (down the street as the parking lot was Über-crowded), the delicious smell of meat and onions was heavy in the air arousing the killer within. Taking in deep breaths of the sweet smell of cooked flesh, I wondered how vegetarians could turn their back this primal love of dead animals cooking on fire. Embracing my predator nature, I grunted towards the family and shuffled them towards Ray's.

Although this was our first time at Hell Burger, the restaurant brought back nostalgic memories of the "old" Ray's the Steaks restaurant and all the good times and great dinner I had enjoyed. The layout was almost the same except for the register at the far end of the room as well as the chalk boards hanging from the ceiling listing some of the drinks and specials. I saw a sign on the wall that read, "Please do not take a table before ordering.." Being the muthafuckin' Rebel that I am, I sat the entire brood down at a table and stopped short of peeing on the chairs in order to mark my new territory. At this point, no sign could tell me what to do...I do as I want b*tches!!

The animal was out and all he wanted to some goddamn tasty burgers to satiate his hunger.

Even in my primal state and hungering for food, I was the gentlemen and told the wife to head up to counter to see the menu and to ask questions while I took care of the twin fun force. The boys and I sat at the table and looked all around at all the delicious food while Mommy did her best to narrow down her choice of burgers. I was proud that my monkeys didn't bounce outta their seats and managed to stay relatively quiet as they waited for the other parental unit to return.

After a few minutes of intense pondering and life changing self-examination, the wife returned with a menu in hand and informed me that she had chosen the the New Jack Zing. I quickly scanned the menu and instantly chose the Big Punisher, making a mental note to come back another time to try the Burger of Seville (burger with Foie Gras) or the Dogcatcher (burger with bone marrow). Knowing that the relative calm state of the monkeys would not last, I needed a burger that was delicious and wouldn't make me feel guilty if I had to suddenly inhale it once the kids got rowdy. A Foie Gras or bone marrow topped burger was something that needed to be enjoyed sans kids so that every tasty bit would be savored and respected.

I went up to the counter, was reminded by the CASH ONLY sign to grab some extra green from the ATM at the end of the narrow hall. With fresh cash in hand, I ordered our burgers, some sweet potato fries, regular fries and an order of Mac 'n Cheese for the little monkeys. Once I had paid I triumphantly headed back to our table....the table we had broken the rules to secure. HAHAHA!

A few minutes later our food arrived and boys pounced out of their chairs to scoop up some fries. I chuckled a bit at their reaction once they discovered the fries were hot and they would say "Ot! Ot" (leave off the "H" for "How the hell do you expect me to eat such HOT fries Daddy?!?) and tried to blow on the fries to cool them off. I grabbed my burger and as a meat purist respected the flavor by not adding ketchup, mustard or mayonnaise. Taking a bite, the juices from my burger filled my mouth and the flavor instantly told me I was dealing with some high quality meat. "Oh my...ummm" were the only words uttered out of my mouth. I looked across the table at my wife and her eyes took on that serious look that told me, "I can't talk, I'm totally into my food."

We shared out bounty with the boys who ate a few small pieces but chose to destroy the fries. The Mac 'n cheese we had ordered for them was ignored by both monkeys despite it being a very very tasty side item. As I reached the halfway point in my burger paradise, my wife and I swapped burgers to try out each other's choice. Delicious delicious. The flavor of the meat shines through and Ray's burgers are truly made with the highest quality beef, cooked to your specific temperature of choice.

One quick note: I really really enjoyed "Henry's Homemade ketchup". Tasty way to enjoy your fries with a flavor different and tastier than the standard Heinz ketchup. This is a big statement from me being a HUGE Heinz lover. The boys sopped up this ketchup with their fries bringing on giggles from other tables as they enjoyed the boy's antics.

The burgers were soon a distant memory as I sat at the table satisfied and happy. Oh food makes me happy, and who knew that a well cooked burger could erase such a bad day. I think Ray should post the following quote to help people suffering from bad days or that are just not feeling themselves:

Burgers; better than Prozac

We wrapped up the day by cleaning the boys' hands and gathering up our little clan of four. It was a great end to a Sunday and the sun seemed brighter, the snow was melting and all I could think about was coming back with the wife to try some of the more "high end" burgers without the twins. Ray's Hell Burger is delicious, but is best enjoyed without kids under 5. Sorry boys!

Farrah Olivia

600 Franklin Street
Alexandria, VA 22314
(703) 778-2233

Visited: August 10, 2008


NOTE:
I'm breaking my own rules by posting a review on this food blog from a prior visit to a restaurant that was originally posted on another blog. I copied this review is from my personal blog because today I was saddened to find out that Farrah Olivia is closed...damn... Apparently this great restaurant closed back on April 29, 2009. I feel stupid for not going back. In honor of Chef Morou and Farrah Olivia, here's the review originally written back on August 10, 2008.


-----------------------------------
Our first anniversary was celebrated yesterday at the renowned restaurant called Farrah Olivia where gifted chef/owner Chef Morou cooked up an incredible meal for the wife and I. For those of you that don't know Chef Morou, he is an incredibly talented chef that beat famous chef Bobby Flay on an episode of Iron Chef America.

We were lucky enough to get the boys asleep at a reasonable time and my Mom and Dad were kind enough to hang out at our house in case the boys decided to wake up. Thankfully the boys stayed asleep and my parents spent most of the evening chatting and watching television.

Back to the dinner...

Did I mention the food was amazing? That and the fact that the wait staff (especially our waiter) were all amazingly kind and very attentive. We were also lucky enough to hit the last day of restaurant week and I opted for the three course meal. the wife ordered the beef fillet cooked medium-well. Once we ordered, one of the waiters brought out a palate cleanser; honey dew juice with fresh carrot froth mixed with cilantro. What simply delicious way to start off our dinner!

Next, my appetizer arrived which was called Shocked Escolar; a white tuna cooked rare lightly encrusted with spices and then chilled. The tuna was served sliced with a delicious wasabi sauce and soy juice caviar (caviar like bubbles made of flavored soy). Each bite was incredible and the presentation of the food was spectacular and full of vivacious color. the wife and I did our best to eat in a civilized manner but we still ended up devouring the appetizer in no time.

Next, the main courses were brought out. the wife's beef fillet was served with a homemade BBQ sauce on the side made up of beef stock, cumin and other spices. It came with two sides, a delicate flan made of cauliflower and white asparagus and the other side of sweet corn cooked with black corn truffles. The beef was so delicate and full of amazing flavor just bursting through the tender meat. Chef Morou had also sent the beef fillet out with a special spice mix served on the side consisting coffee and cumin. YUM YUM YUM!!

My main course was two salmon medallions cooked medium and served with fried cous cous and a citrus picked watermelon rind. The dish was so beautiful it looked like a painting as the color were astounding. The tender pink of the salmon blended with the orange green and red of the fried cous cous side which contrasted with the bold yellow of the picked watermelon rind. Along the edge of the plate, the entire feast was accented with a line of green basil sauce. The dish was a work of art and the flavor was even more impressive.

Again the wife and I devoured our food and shared our food while doing our best to look well mannered and refined. :-) Everything brought out to use thus far was a gastronomic treat and we couldn't wait to see what desert brought us.

As desert arrived, we were impressed that they knew it was our anniversary. Chef Morou had kindly sent out a complimentary and very special dessert for the wife and I to enjoy made up on pine nut cookies, raspberry candies and chocolate truffles:

Our second dessert was a delicious coconut panacotta served with fresh pineapple pieces and a sweet cilantro sauce.
Let me just tell you that BOTH desserts were delicious! Just a quick side note...

I would've posted pix of our appetizer and entrees, but the food was so delicious and we were so ravenous that we didn't think of taking pix. Plus we didn't want to look too touristy by taking pictures of all of our foods. We figured it would be okay to take pictures of the desserts as one of them was made special for us by Chef Morou.

To wrap up the night, Chef Morou was kind enough to come out of the busy kitchen to hang out with us. We thanked him for the delicious meal and generous hospitality.
It's very impressive when such a famous chef takes the time to come out to talk to regular folk like the wife and I. The best part of our chat, was that Chef Morou is such a kind and personable individual that comes off as being very sincere and genuine. At no time did we feel like he was rushing us or trying to run back into his kitchen...he talked to us for almost 30 minutes and we laughed it up and recounted his experience on the Food Network show "The Next Iron Chef". By the way, for those of you that didn't watch it...he was robbed! He definitely should have beaten out many of the other chefs with his innovative and creative dishes.

Anyway, I digress.

Chef Morou thanked us for coming as we thanked him for having us at this wonderful restaurant. He also asked that we return for our 2nd anniversary, and we replied we'd be more than happy to come back.

All around it was a great night filled with amazing food, great company courtesy of my beautiful wife and a great chef's incredible vision and culinary creativity. I think we may have to pay Chef Morou another visit before our 2nd anniversary. :-)

Trader Joe's

7514 Leesburg Pike
Falls Church, VA 22043
(703) 288-0566
http://www.traderjoes.com

Visited: December 5, 2009


Trader Joe's, oh how I love thee....

It seems that whenever I talk about cooking, recipes or discuss homemade food, my buddy Joe's name always seems to enter the conversation. If he was an actual person, one may think there is some sort of man-love affection for him that transcends the platonic level.

I won't lie. I love Joe and he treats me well. Amazing wine and some great beer for very cheap hard-to-believe prices, add 1 star. Great organic products at low prices, another star. A variety of cheeses (I LOVE CHEEEEEEEEESE!!) from all around the world at low low prices, add another star to the tally. Snacks, sweets, cookies, cakes and stuff that continues to add to my fat waistline that's too tasty to pass up...especially at such low prices - 2+ stars.

Yo Joe, I like to crow about your products to everyone I know...but I'm not the only one.

A check of the internet will "learn ya" that there are a bunch of other rabid Trader Joe's fans out there in Cyberworld. There are websites such as www.traderjoesfan.com or www.trackingtraderjoes.com where people review and share their opinions on Trader Joe products...and "stalk" products that have been discontinued. I'm not alone in this dedication that as mentioned earlier, goes beyond just love....

By the way, if you're ever in Trader Joe's, you must try out the Italian Black Truffle Cheese with some of their amazingly fresh Gruyère cheese bread. Combine this little snack with a bottle of tasty wine under 6 bux, and you'll be a happy camper.

Our two monkeys love whenever I hit Trader Joe's as they've now been classically conditioned to expect a balloon if they see the paper TJ grocery bags. As soon as I walk into the house they ask, "Balloon? Balloon?" Who knew that at 21 months kids could already associate a commercial logo to something else...like balloons.

Anyway...I am part of the "TJ" fan club and will vehemently cheer for all their products like a little teenage girl at an American Idol concert.... I love TJ like a fat boy loves cake....Trader Joe's cake.